Here are some jokes from JC, and in the world of comedy that would be Johnny Carson:
We're more effective than birth control pills.
When turkeys mate they think of swans.
Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.
Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.
For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.
Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.
New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
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