Here are some jokes based on funny observations from the news over the last week:
Scientists in Germany have found the world’s oldest sex toy, 28,000 years old and made of stone. I’m not sure how they know it was a sex toy but they are consulting with Larry King to see how it was used.
Last week a United flight from New York to L.A. made an emergency landing because of a fire in the cockpit. It seems the match the pilot was using to light his cigarette got too close to the alcohol he was drinking and that started it.
Woody Allen recently defended Roman Polanski. So mothers, if your teenage daughter is an actress don’t let them be in a Woody Allen movie.
Attorney General Eric Holder said he may sue Arizona for their immigration law. He hasn’t read the law yet, he is going to wait until the movie comes out.
KFC’s new Double Down, famous for its gazillion grams of fat, is wildly successful. So much so that they have a special deal going. They are doing those punch cards and after you buy 10 Double Downs you get a coupon for a free coffin.
There’s a new social network site for children 10 and under called “Togetherville”. Their motto is “it’s never too early to learn to sit around wasting time. Then graduate to video games.”
Sadly, this site was developed after Michael Jackson’s passing. It would have served as a great dating site for him.
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