Here are the best jokes of the week from the late night comedians.
"The entire East Coast is covered with snow banks and snow drifts, or as Toyota drivers call them — 'cushions.'" –Jimmy Fallon
"President Obama told White House reporters that his meeting with bipartisan congressional leaders went, quote, 'well.' When asked why he was being vague, he was like, 'because.'" –Jimmy Fallon
"The East Coast is covered in snow right now. Washington, D.C., and Northern Virginia got almost 35 inches over the weekend. And may get 20 more inches tomorrow. Schools and businesses were closed. They're building snow-bamas all over the place." –Jimmy Kimmel
"The federal government was shut down today, and they estimate it cost about $100 million in lost productivity. The House is literally stuck in the House, and they can't do anything. I have to admit, it is nice to see lawmakers shoveling something else for a change, isn't it?" –Jimmy Kimmel
"Most congressmen are actually taking this opportunity with all the snow to spend some quality time with their mistresses." –Jimmy Kimmel
"Hey, be glad you're not back East. Huge snowstorms. I don't think Washington has seen a snow job like this since that last stimulus package." –Jay Leno
"It was so cold, Nancy Pelosi had to sit in her driveway for 10 minutes defrosting her eyeballs." –Jay Leno
"It was so cold, Sarah Palin had to cancel a speech because she didn't want to take her gloves off to read." –Jay Leno
"And with all this snow, President Obama told all nonessential White House employees they didn't have to come in. Well, actually, just Joe Biden." –Jay Leno
"And how about the commercials for Dockers? Where the guys in their underwear were singing, 'I'm wearing no pants.' I thought that was a new John Edwards for president campaign." –Jay Leno
"But this President Obama, he had an idea about how to handle it. He's going to let the Democrats handle the snow. They'll put it on the back burner and hope it melts." –David Letterman
"And now critics of the automobile industry are saying that Toyota executives knew about the problems with the brakes years and years ago. And they're wondering, rightly so, why did they drag their feet? Well, trying to stop the car. That's what they were doing." –David Letterman
"President Obama just held his first monthly bipartisan meeting and said that working together on jobs would be a good place to start. You know where else would have been a good place to start? A year ago." –Jimmy Fallon
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