Here are some funny quotes from Mae West, (mostly funny, some are just truisms) American actress from 1893-1980, and she was definitely ahead of her time:
A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
A hard man is good to find.
A woman in love can't be reasonable - or she probably wouldn't be in love.
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.
Any time you've got nothing to do and lots of time to do it come on up.
Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for.
Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.
Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
He who hesitates is a damned fool.
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
His mother should have thrown him out and kept the stork.
I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it.
I believe that it's better to be looked over than it is to be overlooked.
I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
I like restraint, if it doesn't go too far.
I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.
I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.
I speak two languages, Body and English.
I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.
I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.
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