Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Funny Observations From Current Events – 03/01/11

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Here are some funny observations made over the last week after watching the news and keeping abreast of current events:

Lady Gaga is a big fan of Facebook.  In fact, she buys all of her meat dresses at Farmville.

President Obama says his administration will no longer defend the law that says that marriage can only exist between a man and a woman.  In passing, he also mentioned that he thought requiring birth certificates should be illegal as well.

A man in India reportedly has the world’s largest family, including 39 wives.  The recurring thought I get is “Too much PMS.”

A nun from Spain was kicked out of her convent because she was spending too much time on Facebook.  My guess is the real underlying reason is she was poking too many people on Facebook.

Harry Reid wants to make prostitution illegal in Nevada.  He apparently thinks it’s wrong to pay for sex yet the American public is always giving money to the government and subsequently being screwed by the government.

CBS cancelled Two and a Half Men for the rest of the season after Charlie Sheen went on a tirade.  They are planning to do a documentary on his life and show it in the time slot of his show.  The thinking is his life is so much like the character he plays no one will be able to tell it is not the show.

Charlie Sheen, now with a lot more time on his hands, wants to write his memoirs.  Unfortunately, it will be a very short book because he was too stoned to remember most of his life.

Also, the other day the porn star who was infamously in the hotel room that he trashed a month or so ago says Charlie is the most destructive person she ever met.  There is no joke here, the irony is so strong in a porn star saying someone is the “most destructive person” that no joke is required.

A woman in Florida was arrested for beating up her roommate because she suspected that she ate her box of thin mints.  She’s really going to be upset now because I’m pretty sure they don’t serve thin mints at all in prison.

In Georgia, police shut down a Girl Scout cookie stand because they didn’t have a permit.  After they were done there they went around town looking to arrest anybody eating apple pie.

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