A question many men have had down through the ages, after they have had a wife or girlfriend for a while is, “Is it possible for me to be right?” The answer is going to be revealed now: Yes, it is possible for you to be right as long as you are not within hearing range of your spouse.
Of course, that doesn’t account for her hearing what you said later on and “correcting” you, so at that point all bets are off. Momentary rightness is better than none at all.
Here is an example of what I’m talking about. The husband is forced to go shopping with his wife. She asks him a question:
Woman: Which dress do you like best, the green one or the red one?
Man: (Tries to shake his head to wake himself up)…uh, I guess the green one is pretty nice.
Woman: (Without even looking at them again to ponder) I think I’m going to go with the red one.
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This is how this scene would go if she was looking at the same dresses with a girlfriend:
Woman: I can’t decide which color I liked best.
Friend: Oh, I definitely like the green one.
Woman: You know, I think you’re right. You are always so smart about these things.
This is what causes men to want to congregate at bars with their male friends. There men are always right no matter how wrong (and stupid) they really are. Here is an example:
Man: I think all words should start with the letter “B.”
(Everyone gets quiet and stares at him blankly.)
Man: Drinks are on me!
Everyone else: (Cheering) Yeah, the letter “B.” Great idea, man, you’re a genius!
Unfortunately, for me, I don’t drink and I’ve always worked at home so I don’t really get out alone with male friends very often. Consequently, I am rarely ever right. (Big Sigh)…maybe I should take up drinking.
The thing that makes it strange though is when a man first meets a woman and they start going out, for a very brief period of time, everything the man says is correct. Sadly, this rightness lasts only a very short time. Apparently, the woman goes into the relationship hopeful that this man will be the exception and then she finally catches on that there are no exceptions. She could rehabilitate his ability to be right but to do that she would have to ship him off to an island inhabited only by men. Ultimately, she knows that the closest her man will get to being right is that if he is right-handed.
It has been said that there are no absolute wrongs or absolute rights in this universe. The closest measurable thing to an absolute wrong would be when a man is having an argument with his spouse.
It would seem then that women think that men are only good for one thing and being right is definitely not it. Well, if that one thing was what I wanted it to be I could live with that. Too bad it’s taking out the trash.
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