Here are some funny observations after keeping an eye on current events over the last week:
A Chinese company is selling sex robots for men. They are so lifelike that they even get regular headaches.
Scientists believe that people born in the next twenty years could live to be a thousand years old. And the way people are gaining weight these days they could also weigh one thousand pounds.
A woman in Texas gave birth to a baby boy weighing 16 lbs and 1 ounce. So now American kids aren’t even waiting to be born to be overweight.
If the government is shut down the TSA will still be working but they are threatening a work slow-down if their pay is delayed. For example, they will only fondle one testicle on men or one breast for women as they go through the line.
House Speaker John Boehner told reporters that dealing with the Obama administration is like dealing with Jell-O. The Jell-O makers are suing for defamation of character.
Katherine Becker, the Garden Grove woman who cut off her husband penis and threw it in the garbage disposal and ground it up, was arrested. It’s a sad story. The physical abuse is one thing, but to destroy a man’s mind is just going too far.
Finally, President Obama has come up with a shovel ready project, the burying of his political career.
In Midway, Georgia police are cutting down on crime by closing a lemonade stand that was being run by three young girls at one of the girl’s homes. After that police were on the hunt for mothers making apple pie or grandmothers who were taking too long to cross the street.
Lady Gaga’s meat dress is now on exhibit at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland. Many health conscious women are insisting if this catches on that they will only wear meat dresses made from grass-fed beef.
Timothy Geither, the Secretary of State, is confident that a debt deal in Congress can get done. Yet after saying that witnesses heard him on the phone with credit card companies to see if the country’s credit card limits can be raised.
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